Value of life- must needed thoughts

I asked one of my friends who has crossed 65 & is heading to 80. What sort of change he is feeling in him?

He sent me the following very interesting lines, which i would like to share with you all.....

1)After loving my parents, my siblings, my spouse, my children, my friends, now i have started loving myself.

2) i just realised that I am not “Atlas”. The world does not rest on my shoulders.

3) i now stopped bargaining with vegetables & fruits vendors. After all, a few Rupees more is not going to burn a hole in my pocket but it might help the poor fellow save for his daughter’s school fees.

4) i pay the taxi driver without waiting for the change. The extra money might bring a smile on his face. After all he is toiling much harder for a living than me

5) i stopped telling the elderly that they've already narrated that story many times. After all, the story makes them walk down the memory lane & relive the past.

6) i have learnt not to correct people even when I know they are wrong. After all, the onus of making everyone perfect is not on me. Peace is more precious than perfection.

7) i give compliments freely & generously. After all it's a mood enhancer not only for the recipient, but also for me

8) i have learnt not to bother about a crease or a spot on my shirt. After all, personality speaks louder than appearances.

9) i walk away from people who don't value me. After all, they might not know my worth, but I do.

10) i remain cool when someone plays dirty politics to outrun me in the rat race. After all, I am not a rat & neither am I in any race.

11) i am learning not to be embarrassed by my emotions. After all, it's my emotions that make me human.

12) i have learnt that its better to drop the ego than to break a relationship. After all, my ego will keep me aloof whereas with relationships I will never be alone*.

13) i have learnt to live each day as if it's the last. After all, it might be the last.

14) i am doing what makes me happy. After all, I am responsible for my happiness, and I owe it to me.

 ☘ 🥒

*i decided to send this to many, because why do we have to wait for so long, why can't we practice this at any stage.and age.......*

What kind of children are we creating???

A few weeks ago, I had attended a birthday party of my daughter’s friend. There they played a game, the age old ‘Passing the parcel’, however, what was different was the way it was played. The child who was caught with the parcel when the music stopped was asked to leave the circle, but with that parcel as the gift, and then a new parcel was introduced. The game continued till every child got a gift. I asked the mother what was wrong with the earlier version, the version we had all grown up with.

She said – “I do not like kids to be disappointed. See, here every child is happy as he or she gets to take a gift home.”

In another instance, I was in the park with my daughter. She was playing lock and key with her friends. Now, one of her friends fell down. Her mother, who was on the other side of the park ran to his son, all confused and upset. She scooped her son in her lap and started inquiring – “Are you hurt? Let me see! Do no cry! Shush, mama is here.”

The child, had a scraped knee, who was perfectly OK till then, started crying earnestly.

I was at a friend’s home for lunch. Her 5-year old daughter refused to eat what was cooked for lunch. My friends felt so guilty that her daughter would go hungry, that she cooked up her favourite pasta immediately. According to her, it was not the first time this had happened.

At the School Sports Day, there are no races, no competition. No first, second or runner ups. Because, everyone is equal, there should be no competition between the kids.

Kids today have a room full of toys and games. Some they ask, some they do not. But, they still get them.

Everything in excess is the new mantra of life.

Our parents taught us self-reliance, while we hover around our children and want to protect them at all costs. We like to hold our babies closer to the protection of the nest. We go out of our way and rustle up something when they don’t eat what’s cooked at home for everyone else, because we don’t them to sleep hungry. Instead of letting them play outside, we organize activities for them. We do their homework and their assignments. We even resolve their conflicts for them.

It makes me wonder, what will happen to these kids when they grow up?

Will they get a gift everytime they fail? Will they be able to handle disappointment? A child who has never been denied anything, how will he cope with rejections? There are a growing number of cases when kids run away from home or commit suicide because they are not able to deal with low marks in examinations or when they fail to secure an admission in an institution of their choice.

Will their parents keep them hidden in their bosom all their life? Our mothers never ran after us, a scraped knee was just that. She would ask us to wash it with some water and then forget about it. But, there was no drama that followed.

Falling and hurting was a part of daily life for us. We cycled, climbed up trees and jumped from the stairs. Today, kids travel in elevators and escalators (because they might fall down the stairs and get themselves hurt). Earlier, kids walked and cycled. I hardly see kids walking nowadays, unless it’s for a kids’ marathon and they are required to pose for selfies with their cool mommies.

Will they shy away from competition or be able to survive it? OK, so we can accompany our kids till the college gate and sit in the waiting area while they appear for a job interview. 

A child who is never used to losing – how will he survive in the big bad world?

We are raising our kids to be adult babies.

So what should we do?

Stop telling our children that they are special all the time. They are not, at least not always. So reserve the praises for the times when they actually deserve.

Stop going out of the way to create happiness in their life. The life is a mix of joys and sorrows, and it is for a reason. We have no right to interfere with the nature. So let’s stop pretending that everything is all right when it’s not. Let the kids have their fair share of disappointments at an early age. It’s better to fall at 10, than at 40 !!

*What is Maturity of Mind ? *

1. Correcting ourselves without trying to correct others.

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2. Accepting others with their short comings.



3. Understanding the opinions of others from their perspectives.



4. Learning to leave what are to be avoided.



5. Leaving the expectations from others.



6. Doing whatever we do with peace of mind.



7. Avoiding to prove our intelligence on others.



8. Avoiding the status that others should accept our actions.


9. Avoiding the comparisons of ourselves with others.


10. Trying to keep our peace in our mind
      without worrying for anything.


11. Understanding the difference between the basic needs
      and what we want.


12. Reaching the status that happiness is not connected
      with material things.


*Our life will be simple if only we practice.