Power of Appreciation

Question :What is the best advice your mother ever gave you? 

Answer By Jonathan Pettit

I was about ten. My mom had just finished creating one of her amazing meals, and I thoroughly enjoyed it. Delicious. Later, as I was washing the dishes, my mom came up to me. “Sorry, dinner was so awful again,” she said.

I was shocked. “What? No, it was great. I loved it.”

“Really?” she said, with mock surprise. “You always eat so quietly, never saying anything. You’ve never told me you liked my cooking, so I thought you hated it.”

“No, you’re the best cook I know.”

“Then you should tell me that,” she said. “Whenever someone does something nice for you, you should thank that person. If you don’t, then she might think she’s not appreciated and stop doing those nice things.”

Something clicked right then. From that day onward, I thanked everyone for literally everything. If anyone did something that even vaguely helped me, I thanked that person profusely. It became a habit, something I didn’t even think about, and that’s when the magic started happening.

People liked me more. They talked to me more, shared with me, were more friendly. In my first year of high school, during the final week, I came home and found a giant freezie (a kind of sweet frozen snack) waiting for me. “Thanks, mom!” I said instinctively.

“This isn’t from me, she said. “This is from your bus driver.” He had been driving that bus for years, and my siblings and I were the first people to ever thank him as we got dropped off. Those two simple words made a huge difference, so much so that he went out of his way to tell our mom and give us a present.

That’s the power of appreciation. When you have it, all is right in the world, but when it’s missing life is empty. My mom taught me many things, but taking two seconds to say ‘thank you’ every time, in any situation, was the best.

*Debriefing of this Story*

You would have met people who call themselves as good critics but have you ever met a person who says I am good at appreciating others? Isn't that a sad part of our society?

Let's start appreciating people more frequently especially people who are close to us. 

"The sweetest of all sounds is praise"

*Sending you good vibes to start with positive energy*

🙏🙏🌹

*The Parable of the Coffee Bottle*

A young couple had neighbours who were senior citizens, the husband around 80 years old, and the wife about 5 years younger. 

The young couple were very fond of the elderly couple and made it a point to visit them and have coffee with them every Sunday.

They observed that the old lady would bring the coffee bottle to her husband to be opened, every time.

The thoughtful young man gifted the lady a gadget, without her husbands knowledge, to easily open the bottle, and showed her how to use it.

On their next visit, the old lady once again brought the bottle for her husband to open! The young couple was amazed! Had she forgotten about the gadget?! 

When the opportunity arose to be alone with the old lady, they quizzed her about this. Her reply made them speechless......

She said: "Oh, I can open the bottle myself, even without your gadget! But I get him to open it so he feels he is still stronger than I am and thus the man of our home.......that he remains useful to me as always; that I still depend on him; that togetherness is the main ingredient of any marriage....we don't have many more years of life in us, and togetherness is of utmost importance......"

*Moral*: Never underestimate the wisdom of the elderly. Our parents/grandparents may not be bringing in money any longer, but their guidance alone is priceless. You may have a fruitless tree in your garden, but at least it gives you shade......you will not cut it off, now, will you? Looking after the elderly and infirm should be looked upon as a *blessing*.

First - things -first

👌👌👌

I got married at 25, finished my PhD at 27 and became a Professor at 40.

So fast you see! Yes, everything around me worked fast. It is now that I realise that it was a misplaced priority.

My ambition blindfolded me and I got it all wrong, that is why I am sharing my experience through this medium to warn and encourage our young mothers not to be careless as I was back then.

I worked very hard as a lecturer and as an administrator, always so busy that it became my language to my children...."I'm busy"

My mum was around to nurse the children for me for some time. The moment they clocked ten, I sent them to boarding schools, though my husband was not in support of this. I always found my way.

I had no warm relationship with my children, 2 boys and a girl.

I never knew it was a bad idea not to have time for my husband, children and the household, until 5 years ago, when guilt, loneliness and restlessness filled my heart.

I sent for my children to rejoice with me on my 60th birthday.

The two boys, living in Canada said they are "busy" and that their sister will come down from South Africa.

Two days to my birthday, my daughter sent this message to me, "Mum, I am very sorry not to be around over there, there is no time to squeeze out, my husband needs my attention at his newly established clinic and presently, I'm pregnant. "I'm very very busy,
I'm also lonely in a strange land. Please pray for us mum. Happy birthday". I could not recover from the meaning I got from the message.. "First-things-First". When they needed me for warmth and discussion, I was not available, now I needed them for warmth and discussion I could not get them, rather they returned my slogan back to me, "I'm busy"

To worsen the matter, my dear husband died in his sleep a month after. ...Only one of the children came ​without​ his family to the burial ceremony.

I was dumbfounded!!! Considered Opinion: it is good to work and be a hard working fellow.
But hear this important and salient truth:

Parenting is sacrificial work, give it all it takes. Avoid any work that will take away your attention too much from your home - Avoid it and be careful!

SOLIDIFY YOUR HOME FIRST, CREATE TIME FOR YOUR SPOUSE AND CHILDREN.

ESTABLISH THE FEAR OF GOD IN THEIR HEARTS THROUGH YOUR ATTITUDE AND BEHAVIOUR.

THOUGH IT IS COSTLY NOW, THE FUTURE REWARD IS WORTH IT.

THIS IS AN EYE OPENER FOR BOTH MEN & WOMEN.

LET'S BE SELFLESSLY AVAILABLE WHEN OUR CHILDREN NEED US.



Source : unknown

What kind of children are we creating???

A few weeks ago, I had attended a birthday party of my daughter’s friend. There they played a game, the age old ‘Passing the parcel’, however, what was different was the way it was played. The child who was caught with the parcel when the music stopped was asked to leave the circle, but with that parcel as the gift, and then a new parcel was introduced. The game continued till every child got a gift. I asked the mother what was wrong with the earlier version, the version we had all grown up with.

She said – “I do not like kids to be disappointed. See, here every child is happy as he or she gets to take a gift home.”

In another instance, I was in the park with my daughter. She was playing lock and key with her friends. Now, one of her friends fell down. Her mother, who was on the other side of the park ran to his son, all confused and upset. She scooped her son in her lap and started inquiring – “Are you hurt? Let me see! Do no cry! Shush, mama is here.”

The child, had a scraped knee, who was perfectly OK till then, started crying earnestly.

I was at a friend’s home for lunch. Her 5-year old daughter refused to eat what was cooked for lunch. My friends felt so guilty that her daughter would go hungry, that she cooked up her favourite pasta immediately. According to her, it was not the first time this had happened.

At the School Sports Day, there are no races, no competition. No first, second or runner ups. Because, everyone is equal, there should be no competition between the kids.

Kids today have a room full of toys and games. Some they ask, some they do not. But, they still get them.

Everything in excess is the new mantra of life.

Our parents taught us self-reliance, while we hover around our children and want to protect them at all costs. We like to hold our babies closer to the protection of the nest. We go out of our way and rustle up something when they don’t eat what’s cooked at home for everyone else, because we don’t them to sleep hungry. Instead of letting them play outside, we organize activities for them. We do their homework and their assignments. We even resolve their conflicts for them.

It makes me wonder, what will happen to these kids when they grow up?

Will they get a gift everytime they fail? Will they be able to handle disappointment? A child who has never been denied anything, how will he cope with rejections? There are a growing number of cases when kids run away from home or commit suicide because they are not able to deal with low marks in examinations or when they fail to secure an admission in an institution of their choice.

Will their parents keep them hidden in their bosom all their life? Our mothers never ran after us, a scraped knee was just that. She would ask us to wash it with some water and then forget about it. But, there was no drama that followed.

Falling and hurting was a part of daily life for us. We cycled, climbed up trees and jumped from the stairs. Today, kids travel in elevators and escalators (because they might fall down the stairs and get themselves hurt). Earlier, kids walked and cycled. I hardly see kids walking nowadays, unless it’s for a kids’ marathon and they are required to pose for selfies with their cool mommies.

Will they shy away from competition or be able to survive it? OK, so we can accompany our kids till the college gate and sit in the waiting area while they appear for a job interview. 

A child who is never used to losing – how will he survive in the big bad world?

We are raising our kids to be adult babies.

So what should we do?

Stop telling our children that they are special all the time. They are not, at least not always. So reserve the praises for the times when they actually deserve.

Stop going out of the way to create happiness in their life. The life is a mix of joys and sorrows, and it is for a reason. We have no right to interfere with the nature. So let’s stop pretending that everything is all right when it’s not. Let the kids have their fair share of disappointments at an early age. It’s better to fall at 10, than at 40 !!

Symptoms of Inner peace

*Symptoms Of Inner Peace..*

1. Frequent attacks of *Smiling*
2. Frequent overwhelming episodes of *Appreciation*
3. Loss of interest in *Judging* other people.
4. Loss of ability to *Worry*
5. Tendency to act based on *Hope* rather than on fear.
6. Ability to *Enjoy* Each Moment.
7. Ability to Give & Receive *Love* { inspite of life's problems }.
8. *Sharing* whatever little you have with people having less in life.

*_If symptoms persist,_*
*Just THANK GOD !*